You - the guy with the cigarette out the window, the rap blasting so loud it shakes the car frame, bobbing your head like Tupac reincarnated. You are actually failing to be what you want to be [cool] and becoming what I have known you to be all along [sad, as in lame sad].
Let's get real here, you are a cultural cliche. You are the guy who wants so badly to personify a stereotype that is, to begin with, completely terrible, and yet somehow you are failing. I can see this, you can see this, now please admit it, before I start to cry with nostalgia for 1992.
Monday, August 31, 2009
Get Real #2
Hey you.
Yeah, the lady I've been serving for the past 20 minutes. While I know what you want to eat could be a hard choice to make, it's not this hard.
I mean, let's get real here, I've got other people to serve. You are not the most important person in my day, but you are the most time consuming and annoying. Hurry up and decide, or don't get anything at all. That is your only decision right now.
Yeah, the lady I've been serving for the past 20 minutes. While I know what you want to eat could be a hard choice to make, it's not this hard.
I mean, let's get real here, I've got other people to serve. You are not the most important person in my day, but you are the most time consuming and annoying. Hurry up and decide, or don't get anything at all. That is your only decision right now.
Fixing... what?
Alright Dell. Let's get real here. When you take a computer to fix it, why half ass it? Why replace the keyboard, the hard-drive, and... oh wait, you left the scratches and cracks on the shell?! Oh hay, that's awesome.
Exactly what was running through my head when I thought about a laptop being fixed for a broken base.
Except for, well you know, that it wasn't.
Let's get real and just admit that Mac is superior, Mac does it right, and Mac makes us all feel like we're technologically advanced (even if the machines we use are actually more intelligent than we are.)
Exactly what was running through my head when I thought about a laptop being fixed for a broken base.
Except for, well you know, that it wasn't.
Let's get real and just admit that Mac is superior, Mac does it right, and Mac makes us all feel like we're technologically advanced (even if the machines we use are actually more intelligent than we are.)
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Numero Uno.
Somehow, Espanol seems like the correct way to begin here.
Alright, to all the people with menial jobs who seem to think that your promotion/title/role is the be-all and end-all to your conglomerate's general enterprising situation, I have this to say. The title you are given has been decided upon by the higher-ups in your company to boost employee morale. Being a "Treasurer" or "Customer Service Specialist" is not something you add to your life's accomplishment. It is total bullshit. I am working off the assumption you are somewhere between fourteen and twenty, working with me or serving me, and attempting to look down your acne-d nose at me. I do not take this kindly, "average retail chain" employee. So you're promoted, or titled, but let's get real, this does not entitle you to behave in a "holier than thou" sort of way. Face it, you're a Cineplex/Wendy's/Old Navy worker, and that doesn't change with a simple title. Yes, you know your way around, yes, you have been recognized, and no, you don't need to take this opportunity to demonstrate all of this. You can take your job seriously and still have a good time. Get real.
Alright, to all the people with menial jobs who seem to think that your promotion/title/role is the be-all and end-all to your conglomerate's general enterprising situation, I have this to say. The title you are given has been decided upon by the higher-ups in your company to boost employee morale. Being a "Treasurer" or "Customer Service Specialist" is not something you add to your life's accomplishment. It is total bullshit. I am working off the assumption you are somewhere between fourteen and twenty, working with me or serving me, and attempting to look down your acne-d nose at me. I do not take this kindly, "average retail chain" employee. So you're promoted, or titled, but let's get real, this does not entitle you to behave in a "holier than thou" sort of way. Face it, you're a Cineplex/Wendy's/Old Navy worker, and that doesn't change with a simple title. Yes, you know your way around, yes, you have been recognized, and no, you don't need to take this opportunity to demonstrate all of this. You can take your job seriously and still have a good time. Get real.
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